The United Nigerian Wives in South Africa
After experiencing the disaffection of fellow South Africans for finding love with Nigerian men, the women decided to take measures to protect themselves. About two years ago they formed an association, the United Nigerian Wives in South Africa (UNWISA) club, where they give support and help to each other.
Lindwela Uche, the chairwoman of the group, confessed that they saw the xenophobic attacks coming and alerted their husbands about the danger but they did not take their warning seriously.
“We saw this thing coming and that’s why we formed this association. If only they (the authorities) had listened to us… they would have known that there’s a fire burning slowly and they would have seen how to tackle it,” she said.
According to Lufunu Orji, who is married to a Nigerian resource consultant, Ogbonnaya Orji, having a foreign husband is very challenging.
“You often spend your time defending yourself and then you defend your foreign husband for being himself. Just before I got wed to my husband, I lost two very best friends of mine. They thought I was out of my mind,” she said.
Everyday life for the wives, their husbands and their children is a constant battle with criticism from neighbours, schools, government officials, health workers and even the police.
Another member of the group, who gave her name as Uche, said that her 13-year-old daughter returned from school, complaining that her teacher had told her “not to bring that Nigerian mentality here” after she and classmates were noisy in class.
“We need to be protected, we need our children to be protected… and our husbands to be treated with dignity,” Uche pleaded.
Thelma Okoro, 37, confessed that the attitude towards them is negative everywhere they go. According to her, wearing traditional Nigerian dress on the street can attract bad comments. She spoke of how her eight-year-old daughter gets mocked by schoolmates over her name “Ngozi” which means “blessing” in Igbo but literally translates to “danger” in Zulu.
Some of UNWISA’s members have kept their maiden names because their husbands’ names attract rude remarks.
Okoro, who has been married to Kenneth for 13 years, says she was told off by an official when she tried to apply for free government-issued houses in 2011.
“They told me that I was not entitled because I am married to a foreigner, and that if I wanted a house I must divorce the man first,” she said.
She recalled the case when she was taking her sick children to hospital, where “the nurses ask ‘why are you giving these people residence papers’ — degrading and discrediting our choices”.
Now UNWISA club is going to widen its reach to South African women married to other foreign nationals after the recent anti-immigrant attacks, Daily Mail reports.
One victim, Nokuthula Mabaso, told local media that she was threatened with rape for dating her Zimbabwean boyfriend Elias Chauke.
“A group of Zulu-speaking men arrived and kicked down the door.
“They asked me why I dated a foreigner when there were many South African men in the squatter camp and I replied that I love Elias. They then assaulted and robbed me.
“One of them threatened to rape us and was stopped by others,” the woman said.
Recently, the South African president, Jacob Zuma, held a press conference where he tried to restore the image of his nation, declaring that they are not a xenophobic people.
However, the Nigerian government is planning to demand N84 million from South Africa as damages for its citizens who are victims of the xenophobic attacks in the country.
No comments:
Post a Comment